(I sent this email to the families of the girls in my advisory group. Never sent such a prose-ish note to them before, but I felt compelled. Likewise, I feel compelled to share it with you—maybe you aren’t a 12 year old with a changing body and racing mind…but somebody out there is going through a change that is altogether messy and beautiful. Honey, you deserve patience. Grow.
Good evening, Slay Queen Families!
I saw this quote online earlier and was struck by how much our girls need to hear it:
“She’s learning to love herself. It can be an internal war or some days and it can be bliss on others, through it all, she deserves patience.” ~ Billy Chapata
I’d be lying if I say that the girls don’t drive me crazy sometimes…as I know they drive you as well. They say things—do things—or not—and it seems like everything you’ve ever told them went in one eardrum and out the other.
But there are days, right? When all the right things happen. When you ask them once to do something at home and it gets done—or better yet, when you don’t have to ask. For me, it’s watching your girls help younger Scholars create their SLC greetings during Crew last week when their advisor was running late. It’s when some of them come into study hall and pull out their planners/notebooks and get started on their afternoon responsibilities without the slightest peep from me. It’s when I think I get on their nerves with all of the repetitions of “respect has nothing to do with liking someone” and “and whose responsibility was that, again?” and “45 minutes in BOTH subjects in iReady!!” and yet…they surprise me at the end of the school year with a poster (and a plate of whipped cream to the face 🙄) because school won’t be in session when my birthday rolls around. It’s awesome JumpRopes when they are outstanding in class.
It’s moments like these when I feel like the hard work WORKS. When the blood, sweat and tears doesn’t seem to be in vain. When I catch glimpses that these girls will be high schoolers in a few short years and that fact doesn’t scare me a bit. I love to share these moments with you because I’ve only been riding this train for a year—you’ve been conducting it for a lifetime.
Some days, it can be an internal war. Some days, it can be bliss. Through it all, she deserves patience. They deserve patience because as much as we scratch our heads at their behavior from time to time (or all the time), they don’t get it either. They deserve patience because we remember what it was to be the gangly, awkward, hormonal, irritated, pimply, complicated pre-teen wonder. I definitely remember—and I remember the adults that fought past my foolishness and left an impact because despite my efforts to the contrary, they saw WORTHY all over me.
This week, I vow to give them patience. Hold me to that!! Right here is where the waiting meets the promise.